Character

   

Growing up I often heard it said that sports builds character.  A few years ago I came to realize that was not true. 
         The more I was around organized and competitive sports the more I came to believe that sports does not build character, rather, sports reveal character.

Character is built in our homes, our families, our churches, our day-to-day interaction with our children.  If sports truly built character, then it would seem to make sense that the more success one had at sports the more quality character a person would have.

Yet I look at the history of a Ray Lewis, the devastation of the acts of Oscar Pistorius, or the sideline rantings of brothers coaching opposing teams in a Super Bowl, and I just think, that is not what I want my children to be.

I think about the arrests of SEC athletes, or the athletic scandals of ACC athletes or the complete moral failures of Big Ten programs, and I realize that sport is not something that builds character.

Does this mean that I believe that sports destroy character?  Not at all.  I think it can be a great proving ground for character and integrity.  The two athletes pictured above with my daughter are great examples of strong character.  They are Godly women, who achieved academic and athletic success, and led their school to a national championship.

Their characters were forged in the fires of their families.  Their honesty, integrity, determination, drive, and confidence started with Godly parents who loved, taught and cherished them. Athletic competition enabled them to display and refine qualities that were instilled in them by their parents.

I write these words to remind all of us as parents that we are responsible more than anyone for shaping who are children will become.  We are responsible for them mind, body and soul.

If we try to pass off that responsibility to coaches, or to schools, or to any other person, we are cheating ourselves and our children of a valuable life experience.

We are responsible for praying for our children.  We are responsible for their understanding of what to do with their God given abilities.  We are responsible for the nourishment of their bodies, of their mind, and of their spirits.

Our window of responsibility is a short one.  One day they will leave us and their character will be put to test in the fires of the real world.  Their success or failure, not as athletes, but as people, is intricately tied to what we do with them and for them now.

           As a parent I understand how hard that path is.  I pray that God will give us all the patience and wisdom and strength that we need, so that our children may become all that they are intended to be.

Will You Pray at Us?

This piece was first written in 1995, situations in the Sudan have changed, and south Sudan is now a nation.  The persecution of Christians has not changed.

WILL YOU PRAY AT US?

I pray for them.  I am not praying for the world, but those

you have give me,  for they are yours.

John 17:9

     They were Sudanese Christians.  The country is rated one of the worst violators of human rights in the world and I wouldn't dare mention their names here, but I had the opportunity to meet them at an athletic competition in another country.  I did not want to meet them.  I had just received news from home that a friend had died and I just wanted to be alone.  The last concern, the last desire on my heart was to reach out to someone else, I was busy being wrapped up in my own grief.

     Fred persisted.  He made the contact.  He got to know the whole group.  Finally I had the opportunity to spend the afternoon with them.  We ate together and we watched a video of a basketball game, and then the two who were Christians invited us into their room before they left to return to their country.  When the one looked at us and said, "Will you pray at us?"  I almost cried right there. 

     They told us the needs they had.  One had been married only seven months. Both were extremely worried about their families and the religious persecution they were facing at home.  They told us how friends seemed to disappear everyday.  They had a little security because they were athletes and affiliated with the military, but if it wasn't for that they did not know what would happen to them.  Militant Islamic forces are still waging war against the people from southern Sudan where these men are from.

     When they finished telling their stories we began to pray.  I prayed for one, Fred the other, and not only did we pray for them, we prayed at them, we threw our hearts and souls into the battle.  We realized that our time with them was brief, that we would soon be separated.  We also realized that God had put them in our lives at that particular time for us to encourage as they returned to face the struggle ahead.

     Jesus knew he was about to be separated from his disciples as he prayed in the garden.  The prayer he prayed is recorded in the seventeenth chapter of John.  An interesting thing is that he did not pray a general prayer, "Please keep them all safe."  Rather, he said, "I pray for them.  I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours." 

     Jesus said, in essence, let me get straight to the point, let me pray directly at the subject at hand - not everyone, but these you have given to me.  He prayed for just a few men, the ones in his life, realizing that they were part of the great plan, the Father's plan.  Luke goes so far as to tell as that as Jesus prayed in the garden he shed great drops of blood.  We need to learn from the master how to pray at the people He has put in our life.  We need to move away from the generic, "God bless everyone" prayers, to Christ-like, "God hold this my sister or this my brother" prayers.  We need to be specific in who we pray at.

     Thank God he gave us the chance to pray at our Sudanese brothers. We prayed at them to encourage them, to remind them that Jesus died and lives for all men.  We prayed at them to remind them that they had brothers in other parts of the world who held them in their hearts.  As we drove away from their hotel the last image we had was of the rest of the team going through their Muslim prayer ritual, prostrating themselves and praying toward Mecca.  These men returned to a land where they will be persecuted for their faith.  We fervently pray that we will hear from them again, but they could be gone in no time.

     Who do you pray at?